This is... summer?

Today, I am being that "typical" person - you know, the one that inhabits coffee shops, laptop and iced coffee close at hand, jamming out to Mumford & Sons. I haven't done this in quite sometime, however, during the school year, I was known to frequent the local coffee shops to spent countless hours reading Philosophy and History texts and write term papers. Lately, however, the balance of my life and my being have been completely thrown off by the little season known as: SUMMER.
One minute, I went to bed stoked that I had FINALLY finished the first year of a 2-year hell known as "Graduate School" and had earned the covetous A's, thus bringing my overall GPA to a higher average than I had my entire undergraduate career at BGSU.
The next minute, I woke up with no study requirements, no classes to teach, no emails from professors flooding my inbox with work requests. I found myself in a precarious position of not having a steady M-F, 9-5 job, and no schoolwork to complete for the first time since... 2004, or the summer before my junior year of high school. Yes, it's true, I have been doing the 9-month school year, 3-month 40-hour work week summer for the last 7 years. Of those years, the last 4-5 years have been filled with college, then a summer of Leadership Training in Estes Park, Colorado and a 40-hour work week at the YMCA of the Rockies in Food Service. I haven't spent a summer in Ohio since 2006, the summer after I graduated high school, when I still worked in the Games Dept. at Kings Island.

But that all has changed. I can't imagine that God is a fan of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, but I can very much picture him saying, "And now, it's time for something a little different." Not only am I spending a summer in Ohio for the first time in nearly 5 years, but I'm spending my summer in somewhat unfamiliar territory to me: Northeast Ohio. I've never actually claimed to LIVE in the same town where I go to school, even if my residential address has been in the town for 9 months of the year. But in August of this year, I can say that I have lived in Kent for 1 complete year. A completely new and unfamiliar experience for me.

Of what, exactly, does my summer consist? I'm still figuring that one out, but there are few details I do have nailed down right now, and some things of my own I'd like to do.

Currently, I have 4 different jobs. 1 is actual employment, the other 3 are considered "self-employed." This is going to make paying taxes to the government a little more complicated and interesting than normal, for sure (if you're interested in those kinds of things). Here they are:

May 22 - August 20: Kent State University School of Music: Music Education Dept.
Net Income: $990, before taxes
I'll be cataloguing new and old materials for the new Music Education Resource Center, updating listservs, updating/re-writing the Handbook for Music Education, preparing observation schedules for Fall 2011, working on syllabi for Fall 2011 classes, and other various projects they come up with (and they will, believe me, they will).

June 1 - the future: Sound Board Music, Instrumental & Keyboard Instructor
Net Income: depends on the # of students I accrue; $30/month/student is the rate for lessons
Currently, the owner has it set up that I will be accepting violin, viola, cello, bass, flute, clarinet, alto/tenor saxophone, and elementary/intermediate piano/keyboard students.
This job I will be able to keep going through the next school year. Just over in Stow, it will be a nice short drive, which is perfect. I generally would charge $18-$20/lesson (which ends up being ~$75/month/student), which means I'm making less than teaching on my own here, however, this man is finding the students and scheduling them for me. Otherwise, I would need to be sitting in on a lot of band/orchestra rehearsals around the area, and really pushing to get students. This ends up saving me time, and gas money. Two pluses to this job: 1) I can re-arrange students to fit my Fall 2011 Class Schedule and continue teaching and making a little extra money in the fall; 2) Since students pay at the beginning of the month, I still get paid even if a student doesn't show up for a lesson.

July 24-29: Tallmadge HS Marching Band Camp, Woodwind - Clarinet Tech; Marching Tech
Net Income: $350, plus room/board
Travelling to Westerville, OH to teach at Band Camp. It's been a few years since I've worked at a band camp. I'm pretty excited, and a little nervous.

August 1 - 19: Revere HS Marching Band, Woodwind, Drill and Marching Tech
Net Income: $600-$700 (negotiable)
PLEASE be in prayer for this one! I am meeting with the band director in the next week to discuss duties and payment. I'm REALLY praying for $700, as it will help with some bills, and having a little extra money in the savings account for emergency funds (such as car repairs, technology repairs, etc). The set of camps and practices run here are great because they do them all at Revere HS, so I won't have to travel far, except to the HS. I'm really looking forward to this one.

**Currently, I am also in contact with Dr. Stoll from Southeast HS. It is possible that if their camps/practices line up with what I already have scheduled, I will be able to work with them as well.

None of these jobs have started yet, which leaves me with a lot of free time. Aside from working, I've been spending a lot of time with Isaiah. This relationship has been a completely different experience for me. It has required me to work through a lot of my past experiences (fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it). God has been completely faithful in all this to reveal Himself to me, and to guide me through the dark places, wounds, and scars left by my past. I definitely still have a LONG way to go in this area, but looking back at the last two years, I've definitely come a long way. I really don't think I could've asked for a greater friend in my boyfriend; he's been more than patient, and understanding with me as I work through things with God. He allows me space when I need it, and patiently waits until I feel comfortable enough to talk through things. Satan, at times, loves to step in and tell me little lies about all of this, but I know that Jesus has crushed him with His heel, and that the love of God triumphs over all, so I keep listening for the still, small voice (and sometimes, the powerfully gentle voice) that tells me the Truth of who I am, and where He's taking me and guiding us in this.

Though it may not look like it from what I've just described, I actually will have more time than I have in the past to do some work of my own. I have a few things I'd like to personally accomplish over the summer:

• Book List: While I don't have a specific list of books, I'm going to challenge myself to see HOW MANY books I can get through this summer. I've already finished 1 (The Shack), and am in the middle of 3 others (see "Currently Reading" side panel). I'll keep you updated on how many and what I've finished as we keep going.
• Post-a-day: This may not be AS consistent, depending on when I have to send in my laptop for repairs, and being out of town for vacations/work, but I'm going to make a valiant effort. Some days they may be serious posts about what I'm learning, and at times they may just be updates, like this one!
• Pictures: I have a picture blog, because I actually enjoy taking photos. Lately, that hasn't been happening as often, however, I have a reasonable goal to post a picture everyday - every other day. I want to capture my summer in Ohio through pictures, since it's somewhat of a "new" experience for me.
• Curriculum and Course of Study: Go ahead, say it, I dare you: NERD. Whatever, I have a degree and state licensure, so it's my profession now. I currently have 3 books (including the SAGE) on Curriculum and Instruction. I'm also taking a class on the subject in Fall 2011 through the College of Education. My goal is to take some of the Curriculum layouts I started working on for projects in my undergrad, and hopefully develop a full course of study and curriculum that could be implemented in school system. This is a project that will take a lot of time and research, one that I'll probably continue to work on throughout Fall semester. I hope to go as far as to have curriculum for grades K-12 general music, band and orchestra, dividing it up to elementary, middle, and high school, with a possibility of breaking it down into grade level objectives for a school year. We'll see how far I get by the end of the summer. Right now, I'm just in the researching stages.
• Gardening: Yes, I live in an apt., which presents a bit of a challenge when growing plants. Isaiah and I planted 21 plastic cups' worth of seeds on Monday. I will probably plant a few more of the seeds with the remaining potting soil I have later this week. I decided to do this as a surprise (it won't be much of a surprise once she reads this) for my roommate next school year, Cathy. She really wanted a tomato plant on the porch of our new apt. when we move in, but by then, it'd be too late to plant one. Here's the seeds I planted:
• Columbine, Ice Princess, Shasta Daisy, Forget-Me-Not (2 cups each, 1 extra Columbine)
• Cilantro, Oregano, Garlic Chives, Rosemary (2 cups each)
• Bell Pepper, Tomato (3 cups each)
• Vacation Abroad: June 17-28/29. Going home to Cincinnati June 17-19 to see Shelby's final performance as Kylie in "Dead Serious About Life" and their ad-lib show, Father's Day with dad, and visiting friends; June 20-26 in Colorado to visit LT 2011 and friends; June 27-28/29 north of Columbus camping and spending time with family.
• Friends: I'm hoping to meet up with some friends around the area a little more often than I did during the school year for coffee and/or lunch/dinner to catch up and walk through life together this summer.

In all, I believe an ambitious summer lies before me. While I'm nervous about being around Northeast Ohio - an altogether new place for me, and have often gotten nostalgic in the last week, looking through pictures of past summers in the Rocky Mountains and discussing LT's of old with Amber, I know that it will be no less life-changing and exciting. If you've made it to the end of this, congratulations. You have now been updated.

To-Do Lists Calm Me Down

Over the years, I have discovered that I am very much a visual learner. This greatly affects my day-to-day learning experiences, as I generally need to SEE something in order to better understand it. For instance, when a pastor is giving a message at church, I remember it and learn from it 100 times better if I write it down so I can visually see what he/she is saying. Or, if someone is reading a passage from a book or the Bible, I generally need to get my copy out and read along so that I can visually see it. This also affects how I process my life and the things I get thrown.

This means I'm not a verbal processor. I need to think about things, create a visual in my head, or more often, write them down. This is why I STILL own a journal... not to write about the day to day, but to write about what God is teaching me, my prayers to Him, and His answers. But, I also need to do this with other things as well. Which is why "to-do" lists are SO helpful for me. They help me to see EVERYTHING I need to get done, and then to prioritize what needs to get done when. This keeps me from continually getting overwhelmed and losing it (so, if you've ever been near me during a mental break-down, just encourage me to make a list and prioritize, and I'll shut up). 

In making lists and prioritizing them, I think the best piece of advice I received came from my university supervisor and mentor from BGSU, Dr. Kantorski. He told me to make a list of everything I needed to do, wanted to do, and wanted to change. Then, he would ask me to prioritize them, and finally, the MOST IMPORTANT step, was to separate them into two categories: Things I Have Control Over, and Things I Do NOT Have Control Over.

This has definitely helped me over the last year and a half. I am by no means perfect at this, but I'm getting there. Well, with all that being said, here's one for the book of lists!

• Email Mr. Iriarte @ Hudson and Mr. Patterson @ Kent about teaching students privately
• Give copy of resume to Sound Board in Stow
• Email Revere HS about marching band position for the 3rd time in the last week
• Call Woodsy's and ask about summer part-time jobs (ANYTHING!)
• Read Elliott chapters 10 and 11 and do POIs for class Wednesday @ 4:25
• Finish reading Kodaly bio chapter in 346 book for term paper
• Go through notes from undergrad 20th Century Music, and Grout for study materials
• Order supplemental materials to read and study this summer on 20th Century Music
• Prepare books, notes, and other materials to study this summer for Oral Defense Exams
• Make list of non-music related books I want to read over the summer (or summer reading list)
• Finish the dang Kodaly Term Paper!!! (that's what tonight is for)
• Re-write, edit, and finish Philosophy Term Paper! (goodbye, Easter weekend) for April 27
• Read Reimer chapters 8 and 9 and write POIs for April 27
• LISTEN TO QUIZ 4 MUSIC for April 27 (this date seems to keep recurring)
• Catch up on grading Blog Reading Reactions for MTAP
• PREPARE MTAP CLASSROOM MUSIC LECTURE AND MATERIALS FOR THURSDAY! (goodbye any time left after writing term paper for this week)
• Look for more summer jobs/find ways to promote many special talents (does not include computer hacking skills, but DOES include administrative abilities)
• Eventually start looking through old files and papers from undergrad to revise in prep for making teaching portfolio this summer
• Find and apply to schools for substitute teaching for the months of May and June, and pray they pay a lot per day
• Update Finale Notepad on laptop so I can arrange and transcribe awesomeness for string trios and quartets.
• Find paying gigs for the summer that involve me playing an instrument, preferably one with strings.

Anyone see anything I'm missing? I think this may just about cover everything I've been given to do in the last week or two.

And Now For Something a Little Different

Well hey there 2011! It didn't exactly catch me that it was really a "New Year"/2011 until I was on my computer on January 1st, and the computer said "2011." Sure we stayed up until midnight causin' a "ruckus" in the house and having Harry Potter sparkler battles (I WAS hanging out with my sister and some high schoolers, after all), but nothing really felt any different. However, seeing it on my computer made me realize, it's 2011... which means, a NEW year, and a NEW semester (well hello there Spring semester!). With that comes a chance to CHANGE. I believe you can start something new anytime you want, you don't really need a "new year" as an excuse. You can also change anytime you want. However, with a new year and a new semester here, it's a good time to evaluate the last year of life, and the last semester as well. So over the past 2 days, I've taken some time to evaluate where I was, the progression of the last year and semester, where I am, and where I actually want to be/where God wants me to be. Like I said, I believe new things and changes can occur whenever, they don't have to start AS SOON as January 1 hits. So I may start some things right away, and others may be a progression over the next several months or the year.
I also don't believe in "New Year's Resolutions." Most of the time, it's just another broken promise. I generally tend to believe that's because people make their "resolutions" on a whim, without thinking through the pros and cons, and what has to happen in order to achieve that "resolution." They see something on TV, or overhear a friend talking and POOF! I have to do that, too. If you seriously think about it, the majority of the "resolutions" people make are BIG picture goals, i.e. lose # of pounds, not eat ____ food, fix the roof of the house, buy a new car, spend more time with the family, read more books, etc. I think the biggest reason why people never achieve these resolutions or BIG picture goals, is because when making these "resolutions" they don't take into account the small pictures, or steps, it takes in order to achieve the overall goal. Let's take "spend more time with family" as an example. If you just say that, you're left wondering how to do that, so maybe you decide, I'll put off my homework. Without any idea of how to achieve the big, we take the wrong small steps, and eventually give up when it doesn't work. With the right planning, such as, a weekly family game night, eating 3 evening meals together each week, not using the computer between 6-8pm, etc. the big goal has more of a chance of being achieved.
All that being said, I thought about my "resolutions," new things and changes to life that I wanted to see happen. But, I didn't exactly take this lightly. I spent some time praying and reading. After reading through some journals, the Bible, and praying this was the first thing I wrote down:


What do I need to do - what needs to change - for me to follow Christ with more faith, more discipline, more love, more devotion?


Here are some big picture ideas:

1. "Back to the Basics" - read the simple stuff again (Has anyone seen the newest version of The Karate Kid with Jayden Smith and Jackie Chan? That's where I got the following ideas.)
• It's about attitude! do not skip over what you think you already know! 
• The basic message of the Gospel is in everything we do, everything we are.
2. "Spring Clean Continually"
• Block and erase anything questionable from the computer and daily activities
• Always re-evaluate your time management and how time is spent
• Learn to say "no" to unnecessary time commitments that overstep priorities and boundaries
• Assess what's really in your heart and mind - and allow God to touch the deep and clean out the junk
3. "Let it Rain" - healing of the soul
• Open your heart, mind, spirit, soul, and emotions to Christ
• Allow God to bring up the deep and painful things of the past - and be willing to go there with Him for healing that lasts
• Allow God to refresh the soul from its journey in the valleys by taking extended breaks with Him
4. "Pray without Ceasing"
• Be in constant communication with God NO MATTER WHAT! - the good, the bad, temptations, struggles, victories and defeats
• Be in constant prayer for others - God works miracles through prayer.
• "Give thanks, with a grateful heart." 
5. "What Are Others Saying"
• Listen to sermons online
• Take time to read more books
• Be mentored consistently by someone in the church
6. "Sharing is Caring"

                **Why do we tell others about Christ? Why is evangelism important to me?

• Because NO ONE else can love you THIS much with THIS much consistency
• because NOTHING - NOTHING ELSE - can fill what we're searching for - NOTHING ELSE WORKS - nothing else cures, nothing else fills, satisfies, completes - NOTHING ELSE  is ever enough - Christ is the ONLY thing that works!
• For this reason, I need to be more intentional in friendships and relationships. In a dying world, on a campus with tens of THOUSANDS of searching college students - they NEED to know. They long for what fills, satisfies, completes - what cures, what WORKS - what makes them right and whole.

Those are some big pictures goals, followed by either some small steps, or some big goals to go with it. Here are some other small steps, or other goals I have to help improve my quality of life. I believe that NOTHING in life will improve without the above. However, as we all saw last semester, my graduate assistant job became my life by the end of the semester. I was so focused on not failing, that by mid-November I lost focus of everything else in life. The following is a list of goals to help all of me stay healthy: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

• Read AT LEAST one chapter in the Bible each day (started in Romans today, see #1)
• Write in this blog at least once each week
• Starting January 5, 2011 - 1 picture each day for a WHOLE YEAR in my other blog 390:Pictures of Life
• no computer after 10:30PM unless I'm doing schoolwork
• if for schoolwork after 10:30PM ONLY the applications that apply to the homework are going to be used (that means no Facebook and no Skype)
• no university/assistantship work after 8:00PM
• make time - at least 30 minutes each day - to read a book that is NOT a schoolbook or the Bible
• re-read Lord of the Rings and Chronicles of Narnia
• Find opportunities to continue K-12 teaching, i.e. private lessons (This is huge right now since I have been, and still am in some ways, very seriously considering dropping grad school for awhile. Finding opportunities to teach kids while working at the university may be a way to stay in school another year and a half without going crazy.)
• Go to the Rec Center AT LEAST 3 times each week (more as a stress reliever than a weight loss plan)
• Have a REAL, TANGIBLE, PHYSICAL budget (I need to get on this NOW!)
• Make use of the Kent Free Library as a study/work space
• Have people over to the apt. at least once each month for a game or movie night
• Become more conscious of what I eat to be a better steward of the body God has given me (Note: this has VERY little to do with weight, and more to do with a firm belief that when Paul states in 1 Corinthians that our bodies are temples of the Most Holy God, and a recognition that this does not just apply to the defilement of our bodies with sexual acts, but also by being gluttonous with how much we eat, and what we eat)

I recognize that in my humanness I will probably fall short at some point in more than one area listed somewhere, and it may happen a lot sooner than I'd like it to. That being said, I also recognize that I belong to Jesus Christ, who has already forgiven me for coming short, and that through Him and His Power alone, I can succeed and come closer to Him.

Here we go, 2011!